


Say Geronimo

by AnotherAnonymousAuthor



Series: The Life and Times of Maria and Natasha Hill [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Black Hill - Freeform, Established Relationship, F/F, Follow on, Maria POV, References to Captain America: The Winter Soldier, References to Marvel's Agents of SHIELD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-04
Updated: 2014-05-21
Packaged: 2018-01-21 23:42:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 4,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1568204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherAnonymousAuthor/pseuds/AnotherAnonymousAuthor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's all gone. It's gone and you haven't seen or heard from any of them. Not Coulson, not Fury, not Barton. Not her. Until the glass nearly slips out of your hand...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This follows on from the events of Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

The last time you kissed her was in the facility, moments after you finished stitching the bullet hole in her shoulder.

The last time you spoke to her was when you were standing over the grave of Nicholas J. Fury, saying goodbye.

The last time you saw her was when you looked in your review mirror and watched her drive away.

You tried to ignore the crushing sensation in your chest.

That was months ago.

SHIELD is gone, and you work for Stark Industries.

It’s gone and you haven’t heard from any of them. Not Fury, not Coulson, not Barton. Not her.

The meetings have lessened but you are still called into see countless Congressmen when they discover something they missed before.

Every single time with a smug grin, they think they have you, a reason to lock you up.

And every single time with a steely glare, you’re calling them amateurs in your head, and you remind them that they need you.

You have no idea how, and Pepper commends you for it, but you manage to survive it all.

It’s just what you do.

You’re Maria Hill.

But at the moment, it doesn’t feel like who you are.

You’ve been on automatic since she left, putting on an act when you need to, preferring to pretend that you haven’t been able to feel that crushing feeling for months.

Late nights are spent either in your office, or on your couch, Stark Industries paperwork spread out around you as you bury yourself to pass the time.

You don’t know if or when she’s coming back and it seems like a productive time to waste the time.

You’ve been ordered to give yourself the night off from your boss; it’s raining heavily outside, and the wind is howling up the block that you can hear from your fourth floor loft apartment. 

There is a knock on the door, but you only barely hear it over the wind. You had taken to staring at that simple band that was on your left ring finger; it had been there since not long after New York had happened. She had a matching one.

With a glass of wine in your hand, you rise from the couch to slide the door open to see her standing there.

The glass nearly slips out of your hand.


	2. Chapter 2

You put it down before you can drop it.

You’re hand reaches out to make sure that she’s real, and actually standing there and you haven’t just opened a bad bottle of wine.

Her skin is cold to the touch from the rain outside; her hair is plastered to her pale face and you think you see a shiver.

The bags under her eyes make her look like she hasn’t slept since she drove away that day.

The way she holds herself makes you immediately think of a broken rib, maybe two.

She steps closer and slides the door shut.

You’re immediately intoxicated.

When she grips the sides of your top at your waist, you can feel the moisture seep through the material.

You can’t help but think that she is smaller than you remember as your hands cradle her head.

But you can’t deny that she feels the same as she used to, her forehead against yours as she leans into you.

She whispers that she’s home, all the while trying to supress another shiver.

You’re Maria Hill, second in command of a now debunked World Security Organisation with the reputation of an Ice Queen who knows how to get things done; but you don't even try to stop those stray tears making their way down your cheek.

You’re unable to stop yourself from staring at her as you pull her towards the stairs.

You don’t let go of her hand.

You forget about the puddle left by the front door.

It isn’t until you’ve helped her into the shower, and looked her over to check for injuries that need immediate treatment, that you allow yourself to sigh into a kiss under the hot spray.

Her lips are cold and you can taste rain and wine and _Natasha_.


	3. Chapter 3

You don’t sleep much that night.

Between the two of you, you’re the last to close your eyes and the first to open them.

You leave the bed after over an hour of staring at her red hair splayed out on the coffee coloured pillow case when you realise that you most likely only have a red onion and a half block of cheese in the fridge.

Admittedly, eating hasn’t been you’re biggest priority when you have to deal with the US Congress _and_ Tony Stark on a regular basis.

You don’t want to leave but you can see her craving for caffeine kicking in before she’s even woken up.

You press a kiss to her temple and leave a note just in case.

The bakery across the street is open and you run there and back again in the rain.

When you return, she’s facing the window and still asleep.

You sit in the arm chair by the window and watch her sleep.

The smell of the coffee you brought back with you eventually wakes her.

You smile sadly when she lifts her head looking for it, before greeting you good morning and muttering that you’re too far away.

You kneel by the bed and press your lips to hers before handing over the latte.

You can’t stop yourself asking if she’s back for good, just as she takes a sip.

You see her pause and examine the fear written all over your face.

You’re Maria Hill, and you don’t know what happened, or where she was, or who she met along the way and you’re not sure you want to know.

You feel a hand lightly grip your jaw and direct you for another kiss before hearing a whisper that she’s not going anywhere; she’s home for good.

You look at her and you don’t see the Black Widow.

You don’t see Agent Romanov.

You see your wife Natasha.

You see her sitting up in bed, wearing a baggy t-shirt and a pair of your pyjama pants, still half asleep.

And that glint her eyes is telling you the truth.


	4. Chapter 4

Your weekend is surprisingly uneventful.

It’s almost as if overnight, you’ve returned to the habits and familiarity of being around each other again.

It’s natural.

The forty eight hours that you have officially free from Stark Industries is spent relaxing on the couch, more often than not with a certain redhead on top of you.

You can’t stop yourself from pulling her body into yours, just so you can feel her hands on you and taste her on your lips, every chance you get.

It rains all weekend.

But that doesn’t stop her from walking around in shorts and singlet, showing off skin that you are simply tempted to touch.

You don’t leave the loft other than to head to the market for groceries; you didn’t actually have that half block of cheese in the fridge.

You see her jump when someone drops a can of something two aisles over with a loud and resounding clang.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see her watching you, trying to figure out whether or not you if you saw her reaction.

You’re Maria Hill and you’ve realised that never before have you been scared of her; you’ve always been scared for her.

You admit that you more control over less fear when you both belonged to SHIELD; there was numerous tactical units and ground and air support and levels of R&D there was the Avengers; there was Coulson; there was Fury.

Now, all you have is each other, and occasionally Clint because you know if you didn’t at least keep an eye him, your wife would be worried about him.

He hasn’t been the same since Phil ‘died’.

You understand, but only to an extent because she was alive and you knew she would come home, eventually.

Now, it’s all gone. And you can’t help but worry if she is really okay.


	5. Chapter 5

You come home early on Monday.

After two meetings with Pepper, she calls you on your distraction.

You mention that someone close to you recently returned, and at that she smiles fondly and tells you to have the afternoon off.

You can’t hear anything from the other side of the locked door.

You try to squash the minor sensation of panic bubbling away in your stomach.

You tell yourself she is fine, and let yourself in.

You spot her pushing her muscles and her mind in the direction of breaking point between the dining table and the back of the couch.

You get close enough to see a bead of sweat slide down her exposed ribs, right beneath the black sports bra she was wearing.

Your breathing turns heavy.

You force yourself to walk away, making small talk about why you came home so early.

She might not be ready.

It’s been a few days and you’re only making the observation to yourself, not complaining because you simply have her home, that you haven’t had sex yet.

You both needed the ease and simplicity of just being close to the other; you both came from chaotic responsibilities and had only rare occasions to be still and silent.

She’s standing directly in front of you; your mind had distracted you from seeing her rise from the floor.

Her hands are on your hips, and you’re sure that she’s seen that darkness, that lust and that craving in your eyes.

Your lips meet.

Your hands grip at her ribs, you can feel the muscles stretch in her back.

You bite your lip.

She smirks and begins unbuttoning your shirt.

It’s left on the back of the couch as she pulls you slowly towards the stairs.

You fall onto the bed.

You're Maria Hill and you momentarily think that she’s deliberately trying to distract you.

But only momentarily.


	6. Chapter 6

You haven’t left the bed by early evening.

You’re both still naked with no intention to move.

You watch her from against the bottom of the bed, a thick pillow cushioning your back.

She’s unusually quiet, even for her.

You’re simply waiting; you know she wants to tell you.

You hear about where she went; _Russia_.

You listen as she tells you what she did; _hunted_ down her enemies.

You’re heart breaks when she starts crying; her ledger was now _dripping_ in red.

You’re Maria Hill and you’ve never seen her cry.

You’ve seen her in various states of the emotional spectrum; happiness, sadness, pensiveness, rage, obedience, confusion, distrust, annoyance, patience.

But never tears

You cradle her and let her cry.

You hear her mutter and stumble over words through tears; she’s not sure who she is.

She’s always had a purpose, a direction to follow.

Now it’s all gone.

You know it won’t do much but you tell her its okay.

You tell her a hundred times over that you love her, and you’re not going anywhere.

She’s not alone.

You feel the crying and shaking slowly subsiding; she’s never been one to let vulnerability show.

She asks you with red eyes and a small case of the hiccups who she is.

You say that she can be whoever she wants to be.

You say there’s no rush.


	7. Chapter 7

You make it through the rest of the week.

You’re not sure how.

You’ve been distracted all week no matter how hard you try to hide it.

You’ve talked every night with her, about just being; there is no need for money, you both have it; any enemies are not a priority anymore; for now you’ve agreed to just be a married couple.

Pepper asks sweetly how your distraction is doing; you never actually told her who it was.

She finds out early on Friday.

You come out of a meeting to find your wife in your office, waiting with some lunch for you.

You lean against your desk and she greets you with a chaste kiss; this isn’t SHIELD but it’s still your workplace.

That’s when Pepper walks in with some paperwork for yet another meeting.

You hear her speak out; Agent Romanov.

You watch her tense momentarily before turning with a polite smile.

There is small talk as you’re pulled up on not mentioning that it was Agent Romanov who had returned.

She speaks up for you; it’s no longer Agent, and it’s no longer Romanov.

You see the momentary shock in Pepper’s eyes. It’s evident that this was not what she was expecting.

You see her eyes spot the matching bands on your fingers.

You’re Maria Hill, and you’re a married woman.

You’re offered a congratulations before your boss leaves the room.

You giggle for a second next to your smiling wife, before she presses one last kiss to your lips and heads out.

You hear her call out for you to home on time for dinner; she’s cooking.

You wonder why you were so worried.

You wonder how you got so lucky.

You love her.


	8. Chapter 8

You notice a change in the weeks following her return.

You notice her smiling.

You notice that she’s more playful.

You notice that she’s more relaxed.

You realise that she’s _happy_.

You hear her laugh on the phone when she talks to Clint; it infects every inch of your soul and you can’t help but smile at the sound.

You’ve come home three times to music pumping so loudly that she doesn’t hear you open the door and chuckle at the sight before you; you have several videos on your phone of her dancing with no reservations.

You’re caught staring more times than you can count; every time she lifts you onto the bench or the back of the couch, kissing you silent.

You don’t want it to end.

You want her to be as happy for as long as possible.

You’re Maria Hill and you know it won’t last; it terrifies you.

You’ve learnt many things by being at SHIELD, but the first lesson you learnt was that things never stay peaceful forever.

You know the day will come soon when you have to come clean.

You try to hide it but you think she might be able to see it in your eyes.

You hoped for a little bit longer, just a little bit more time.

Until you get a phone call one evening, just as you’ve settled yourself above her.

It’s Phil.


	9. Chapter 9

You almost panic. Almost.

You kiss an apology to her lips and remove yourself.

You say it’s not a good time; she is home and he is supposed to be dead.

You get an answer that makes you stop in the middle of your pacing; he needs your help to finally get rid of HYDRA.

SHIELD is gone so your orders are no longer standing.

You can’t deny him this favour.

But then again, SHIELD is gone so you don’t technically have to do anything.

You have to tell her.

You hang up on him and pin her down.

You watch her face contort from arousal, to confusion, to protectiveness, before settling on understanding with a side of anger.

You say that she needs to listen.

You tell her that those meetings with Pepper, and occasionally Stark was actually the reinvention of the Avengers Initiative.

You explain that Clint isn’t in Mexico; he’s in New York helping to refurbish Stark Tower for training.

You whisper with a hoarse voice that he is alive, that Fury lied and that you didn’t know the entire time; just until he returned to field work.

And he needs your help.

You whisper your apologies about keeping her in the dark about it all; you wanted to tell her but you couldn’t.

You had orders.

You wanted her to have a choice; to choose the uniform rather than feel compelled to return simply out of loyalty.

You just wanted her to be happy.

You’re Maria Hill and she’s quiet through your entire explanation; that scares you more than if she was yelling.

She is silent through your apology; maybe she is simply processing or maybe she is genuinely angry at you and can’t find the words to chastise you.

She is silent.

Your breathing is heavy, laced with fear.

Until she orders you to suit up because you have to help him.

And that she’s going to kill Clint for lying.

And that she’s going to kill Phil for dying.

She’s not so sure about you just yet.

You stay silent.


	10. Chapter 10

You’re not a people person.

You’ve always know this; it’s become more apparent after the few days you’ve spent holed up at Stark Tower.

You were second in command and you had to interact with the high number of agents you were responsible for, especially on the helicarrier.

You don’t like being surrounded by the people downstairs; SHIELD is gone and they are still holding on the idea and principles of the agency.

You haven’t talked to her about anything except the mission; you’ve fallen asleep next to her each night only to wake to cold sheets the next morning.

You miss her.

You’re on the roof of the Tower watching the sunset after a long day; Thor and Cap had returned to New York and Tony had been stirring them up all afternoon.

You could hear the God laughing through the six floors between you; there was an occasional shudder every time he dropped his hammer accidentally.

Clint had been walking around for three days with a black eye and an expression somewhere between a scowl and that of a love struck teenage boy.

You hear the door behind you.

You find a plate of pizza in front of your face blocking the view; she’s making sure you eat.

You want her to talk, to yell, to hit you even; you need to know what’s going through her mind.

You get instead, an apology.

You head turns so quickly for a moment you’re sure it’s going to tumble eighty something floors to the streets of New York.

She laughs and your heart clenches; you’ve missed hearing that sound.

You almost drop your pizza when she tells you Coulson cornered her; explained that you had been following orders and had the role been reversed he would have done the same.

You hear her say that he has forgiven you for hiding things because you were in a tough position; Fury’s second in command.

You hear her apologise; she’s in the same position now because everyone thinks Fury is dead and only three of you know any different.

You’re Maria Hill and she kisses you deeply, whispering apologies and reassurances.

You forget about the breathtaking view in the distance behind you; there’s one right in front of you.


	11. Chapter 11

You're under attack.

But not by Hydra.

You've been sparring in the downstairs gym of Stark Tower.

You've conceded that you're losing; she's pinned you three times before you get her.

You allowed to pin her with a smirk and a kiss that gets wolf whistles over the PA system; she flipped you instantly and warned you not to lose concentration in a fight.

You don't know what happened; you have the Avengers in your face with Cap standing in the back awkwardly.

You feel the words sting; they accuse you of knowing about Coulson.

You see the looks on their faces.

You watch the group grow to include his new team; they say you jumped ship and never had any loyalty to SHIELD.

You glare at them with a look that could melt ice.

You put your foot down; if you are anything, you are not disloyal.

You want to argue; you can't stop that momentary idea that it could be worth the verbal beating to bring this group of people together.

You hear the word coward and you bite.

You tell them where they can stick their ideas of disloyalty; you've been questioned and humiliated on Capitol Hill and in front of the nation.

You say with gritted teeth that you are where you should be; no one will argue with that 13 person team of lawyers Stark has on his payroll.

You turn into Commander Hill and feel like pulling rank; 'privatising global security' at Stark Industries means that you can continue doing the work of SHIELD without being watched so closely.

You tell that you're still being followed; at his call you came to help because you are loyal.

You tell them again to shove their sudden misconceptions; you've helped reboot the Avengers Initiative and you're sick of being blamed.

You're tell them they've all been recruited. 

You're met with silence; Cap and Natasha haven't said a word because they understand.

You're Maria Hill and you maintain that everything you have done since SHIELD went down has been to protect people.

They stay silent.

You can't remember ever losing it like you just did; you risked disciplinary action if you did.

You walk away with your breathing heavy.

You're thrown backwards when an explosion rips through the elevator shaft.

You're under attack.


	12. Chapter 12

You can’t see anything.

Your head spins from the blast.

Your ears are ringing.

You cough from the smoke and hear some grunts that signal the beginning of a fight.

Your ribs are sore and you can feel blood on your face.

You don’t know where she is; she was on the other side of the room when the explosion happened.

You’re pretty sure you know who just blew out the shaft; you can hear a drawl in the accent that tells soldiers to kill some and take others.

You know they want her and her skills; she’s an asset.

So is Barton.

Between you and Coulson, you’re not letting that happen.

You want to know how they got passed JARVIS.

You don’t have a weapon; you had only been sparring so you grope around for the appropriately weapon-sized debris to use.

You hear glass smash; maybe Thor threw someone out of the window.

You can see better as the smoke begins to drift; there’s a flash of red barely 15 feet from you as she works through the enemy.

You have tunnel vision; someone feels your fist on their face as you try to get to her.

You see him but a moment too late; Ward knocks you to the ground with a gun in your face, challenging you to get up.

You see her spot you and snap a neck; she isn’t thinking about her ledger.

She’s thinking about losing you to a bullet in this war.

You can see fear through the hazy smoke.

You have three more automatic weapons aimed at your head and torso as you’re righted to your knees; forced to watch as he challenges her.

You hear her tell him off; it’s not nice to mess with the Widow’s wife.

He gawks but only momentarily.

You see and feel a flash of blue to your left; that drawl is gone and Ward knows it.

You see arrows hit two soldiers to your right in the chest; you finish the third off with a few swift kicks.

You watch him fight to escape; you see her put him on his back and almost snap another neck before someone begs her not to.

You see Coulson and she tells him to get screwed; he knows nothing.

You walk closer and tell her it’s not worth another stain.

You notice soldiers on the ground; the remaining members of the fallen World Security Organisation are scattered around the cavernous room all with minor forms of injuries.

You can see her chest heaving.

You see the fear in her eyes.

You see her vulnerabilities and so does everyone else; you’re her weakness.

You whisper her name; it’s the only thing that seems to pull her out.

She drops her hold; he tries to scramble away but is met with a boot to the face.

Her hands are on you gripping tightly; she’s making sure you’re still alive.

You’re Maria Hill and you’re told off; you’re not allowed to scare her.

You apologise with a smile, foreheads touching.

You realise it’s over; you win.

She kisses you.

You win.


	13. Chapter 13

You’re on the roof again.

It’s quiet up there; so high that the chaos of the streets of Manhattan can’t reach your ears.

You’re surprised she let you out of her sight; it’s been three days but she’s always been around, not far away just in case.

You can’t remember, in all the years of knowing her, ever being able to see such a human side to her, a vulnerability that she can’t hide; you die, she dies.

You can’t stop yourself from thinking; there are selfish wants you have.

You want to go home.

You want to put her in a car with the few belongings you bought with you; you want to go back to your loft with your wife and just be.

You miss those days before you were dragged back into it; she was freer, happier you think.

You had never seen her smile so much.

You can’t help but wonder what your future is going to be like; just the two of you, going back and forth between Stark Industries and this forsaken tower to fight some new form of evil?

You wonder what she wants; does she want just the two of you?

SHIELD is gone and so is HYDRA; you have no obligation to stay, there’s nothing keeping you here.

You wonder if it’s too much to ask for a break.

You didn’t realise you had asked that aloud when you get an answer.

She’s next to you and saying no; it’s been a long few years with the stresses of assignments, of containment, of war.

You hear her say something you’re not expecting; you should start a family.

You head turns so quickly for a moment you’re sure it’s going to tumble eighty something floors to the streets; she laughs.

You hear her explain things she left out when she broke down in your bed at home; the idea of being able to start a family with you kept her coming home.

You never considered that she might want children; in all the time you had known her, maternal instincts had never shown themselves.

You had considered them for yourself but your life was too dangerous.

And it has never come up in conversation.

You ask, when she’s seen the horrors of this world and of others, why she would want to bring a child or children into a world that can be so dangerous and so cruel.

You hear something about mini Maria’s running around; you chuckle and retaliate that mini Natasha’s would be more adorable and would be able to kick Clint’s arse by age three.

You’re Maria Hill, the former second in charge to a now debunked World Security Organisation; you’re so in love with an assassin and a spy that you married her.

You want to start a family with her.

You tell her that; you ask her if she is sure, if she really wants this.

You see her pause for a moment before she looks at you to read your face; she nods.

And then you mutter that you should start practising as soon as possible.

She kisses you hard.

You bite her lip and tell her you love her.

You’re dragged back inside.

She loves you too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End part 1.


End file.
